Post by Brett on Jan 12, 2022 2:11:36 GMT
The hottest tag team in the newly minted World League Championship Wrestling have something to say. Today, we find them in a non-descript room somewhere backstage at the Enterprise Center in St. Louis, MO. Sitting behind a folding table, Matt Lee and Jeff Parker here to speak to the world.
JEFF PARKER: It’s not everyday you join a wrestling promotion that comes with its own television channel. It’s pretty awesome, right?
MATT LEE: Awesome? HELL YEAH IT’S AWESOME!
JEFF PARKER: You see, in addition to traveling the whole world putting on a tag team wrestling clinic for all the fans in the crowd and jokers in the back, we’ve been broadcasting our own little talk show on YouTube. Something we call, well.. The Show!
MATT LEE: THE SHOW RULES!!
Lee is ready to jump over the table, he’s so excited. Jeff puts a hand up and settles him. It’s another indicator that these two work together really well. Parker is the perfect counter to Lee’s wackiness.
MATT LEE: But in all seriousness, we are here to broadcast our message loud and clear to everyone watching on the World Wrestling Network. 2point0 is here in the WLCW to kick some ass and win some championships.
JEFF PARKER: Well, that’s a given, Matt. We’re professional fighters. Plus if we win championships, we get more money. And you know what that means.
MATT LEE: It means I can get my hands on all the vintage Montreal Expos gear a baseball-lovin’ Canuck could ever want!
JEFF PARKER: Yeah, or you could provide a great life for your wife and kids.
MATT LEE: My who?! That ain’t part of the gimmick, Jeff.
JEFF PARKER: Don’t listen to this doofus. I held his child in my arms and I walked his wife down the aisle. He’s a family man, through and through!
MATT LEE: You’re killing the illusion, man!
Jeff Parker rolls his eyes at his partner. Matt Lee starts to go off on a tangent about their upcoming match
MATT LEE: Enough of this real life chatter. I want to talk about what really matters. Later tonight the two of us are going to fight two jokers who have the AUDACITY to steal my name. THE LEE FAMILY?! What the hell is this! Now, I have been combing through the old Lee family tree trying to see if I’m related to any of these buffoons. I CAN’T ACCEPT IT!
JEFF PARKER: I mean, Lee is a pretty common last name. I don’t think they’re related to you…or each other for that matter.
MATT LEE: THEN WHAT IN THE HELL ARE THEY DOING?! “The Lee Family”?! Do you want to know my theory? They say the announcement that we had signed and the whole lot of them decided to try and follow in my footsteps. They want to stand in our shadow and hope the greatness dusts off on them somehow. WELL IT AIN’T HAPPENIN!
Jeff leans forward a little. He adds his own thoughts.
JEFF PARKER: Matt has a point. I don’t know what their reasoning is, but it sounds to me like The Lee Family is trying to pull a fast one on the good fans of the WLCW. “A wrestling dynasty…” I don’t think so! Line those chumps up for a family photo and there’s no way we’re buying it.
MATT LEE: Trevor Lee? Jason Lee? There’s not one good thing about either of those two jokers. They’re going to spend the rest of their WLCW contracts just trying to get a little bit of my Lee greatness. Well guess what?! I’M NOT GIVING IT OUT! THEY CAN’T BE PART OF THIS FAMILY!
JEFF PARKER: Trust me, I was Matt’s very special guest attendee at the latest Lee family reunion. It was the roughest, toughest group of Canadian blockheads you’ve ever seen. They were crushing Molsons and playing hockey until the sun came up. And not one of these supposed “Lee Family” jokers made an appearance.
MATT LEE: THEY’RE FRAUDS! FRAUDS!
JEFF PARKER: Go ahead, Matt. Tell them about some of the real Lee family members that are tougher than these goofs.
Matt twitches a little. Bursting with energy, he starts to tell some Lee family history.
MATT LEE: Well, there’s my great grandfather JEREMIAH LEE! That crazy son of a bitch lost his left foot to frostbite and still outran a Canadian Grizzly!
JEFF PARKER: What an inspiration.
MATT LEE: And how about my Great Aunt Tallulah Lee. She learned how to shoot, skin and butcher a Moose before her sixth birthday. Her whole family got sick and she fed them for an entire winter off that kill!
JEFF PARKER: Part of Canada’s Greatest Generation, for sure…
MATT LEE: The ain’t all inspirations, Jeff. There’s my cousin Bruiser Lee. He hasn’t done anything special, but he did get on the ice and fight two Toronto Maple Leafs during the Stanley Cup. That was just badass.
JEFF PARKER: Ok, I think you’re getting a little off track now.
MATT LEE: WHATEVER! I could go on ALL DAY naming Lee Family members better than the parade of jokers who followed me and you to the WLCW.
JEFF PARKER: Oh, he really could. He doesn’t shut up.
MATT LEE: BUT TALK IS CHEAP! I’m tired of gabbing about these losers. What I’m ready to do is get geared up, fired up and ready to kick some ass. Jason Lee and Trevor Lee?! After tonight you don’t get to use my name! I will slap it right out of your damn mouth!
Jeff nods his head in agreement.
JEFF PARKER: That’s my partner’s way of saying that we’re ready for a fight. Hell, we’re ready to win our debut match in WLCW. There’s no looking back, we’re headed straight for the top. So Trevor and Jason, before you step between those ropes we’ve got an important question…
MATT LEE: DO YOU WANNA TASTE?! HUH?
JEFF PARKER: Step into that ring with us and you’ll get it. I promise!
The scene cuts to black.