Post by Tyler on Mar 1, 2022 18:32:36 GMT
About two weeks ago, rumors that Mance Warner had made his way to WLCW spread like wildfire. The Southern Psycho of the independents was one that fans thought would eventually make it to the big leagues, but as the years went on, the chances started getting slimmer than the chances of Ol' Mancer going a day without a light beer. That's when WLCW came in, taking over the wrestling world by storm starting December 2021. A lot of Mance's former locker room colleagues were getting their opportunities in the titan of a wrestling company, but never Mance. As days came and went, Mancer started wondering if all of those years of sacrificing his body and painting portraits with blood on canvases were all for nothing. All he wanted to do was cement his legacy in the pro wrestling business, just like he saw his favorite wrestlers do back in the 90s for WCW, and so far, he'd failed to live up to the expectations his mind had set for him. Was it time for him to hang up the boots? ...Well, chances are if you're a WLCW fan, keep up to date with the rumor mills, or simply just read the first sentence of this paragraph, you already know where the future lies for Mance Warner. Fast forward through all the meetings, contracts, and podcasts, Mance Warner is finally announced as a part of the WLCW roster. The light beer drinking, lariat throwing, self-proclaimed 'Eye Poke God' had finally made his way to where the big boys play. It's announced via the WLCW website that he'd be making his debut for the company in a match with someone that most would say is just as rugged as Mancer; Eddie Kingston. With the exciting match-up on his mind and nothing but time on his side, Mancer went ahead and busted out the ol' recording equipment and took station in his moms living room.
Mance Warner
"Red light on, baby!"
The sound of a can cracking open can be heard as the audience is greeted by the sight of a joyous Mance Warner sat on a brown, leather couch. He takes a sip out of the Natty Light Beer can we heard being opened earlier followed by an overexaggerated exhale.
Mance Warner
"Ooh, Ol' Mancer needed that, baby."
He slams the beer can onto the coffee table in front of him, which sends beer splattering onto the table. Mance rubs his hands together before flipping his hat backwards.
Mance Warner
"Ol' Mancer has finally walked his ass in ta' Dubya L C Dubya, baby! World League Championship Wrestling, baby. Years and years of blood pouring and bone shattering has lead to this. The non-believers, the Twitter alt accounts, the broke promoters, they said this would never happen, and guess what? IT F--KIN' HAPPENED, BABY! .I know y'all 've probably heard the story a thousand times, the whole no one believed in me and now I've made it bullshit, but this time it's genuine. I never thought this day would come, and now that it has, you can bet your ass I'm not taking it for granted. Well, it depends on what your definition for taking it for granted is. Someone, who may've been me, may've been my uncle, may or may not have spent close to five figures of my contract money on light beer and scantily clad women. It's been a real big argument in my family, we're still trying to find the culprit. I mean, whoever bought all that shit knew what they were doing, it was a worthwhile purchase, but that's beside the point. Let Ol' Mancer get back on track."
He takes another sip of his light beer, followed by yet another overexaggerated exhale.
Mance Warner
"Eddie Kingston! My first opponent here in WLCW, one that I'm very familiar with. Everywhere Eddie's went, he's killed it. Been wrestlin' for what, 'bout 20 years now? Meaning for 'bout 2 decades, Eddie Kingston has been at the top of his game. Most wrestlers give you a few years of great in-ring stuff, hell, some don't give you any, but Eddie... Eddie has been putting his body on the line, putting his body through the King's Road style from Japan for 20 goddamn years. Misawa, Kobashi, Kawada, I understand and see the influence, Eddie. I get a lot of my influence from the Japanese greats too, baby. Chono, Tenzan, WCW in I'd like to say... '99? '98 maybe, just goin' in there on Monday Nitro, f--kin' Disco Inferno up, shit was awesome."
Warner lets out a slight chuckle, seemingly getting excited just at the thought of Disco Inferno getting his ass kicked by Chono & Tenzan.
Mance Warner
"Saturday Night Storm, baby. Gonna look just like that episode of Nitro. I'm Chono and Tenzan, you're Disco Inferno."
He points at the camera while uttering the last sentence, a huge grin plastered onto his face.
Mance Warner
"Damn, I'm excited, man."
He takes another sip of the light beer.
Mance Warner
"Eddie, me and you, we're 2 bad motherf--kers, man. Some real ass kickers. No matter the result, whether I win, whether I lose, preferably win, I know we're gonna tear the roof off the place. Probably gonna beat the shit out of each other 'till our chests are black and blue, but f--k it, man, that's what we both live to do; beat the shit out of people. After the match, I'll take ya' backstage, we can share a few light beers together, 'cause trust me, I've watched enough of your work, I know I'ma need a few drinks after the match, we can watch some of Great Muta's run in WCW, baby, 'cause I've heard enough about you lovin' 90s Japanese wrasslin', then after all that, when it's time for me to leave the arena, I'll most likely make my way down to Sheetz, if you don't know what that is, prepare to have your mind blown. It's like a gas station, right?..."
Mancer leans into the camera. You can hear footsteps walking down a flight of stairs in the background, a figure can be seen in the blurred out background.
Mance Warner
"...But you can order f--kin' food on a screen, man. Craziest shit ever. When I fir-"
Mance Warner's Mom
"MANCE!"
Mance is shaken with fear as he turns around.
Mance Warner
"Yes, mama?"
Mance Warner's Mom
"DID YOU SPILL YOUR DAMN BEER ON MY NEW COFFEE TABLE!? I JUST BOUGHT THIS LAST WEEK!"
Mance Warner
"I did, mama, I did. Super sorry 'bout that, I just thought that maybe you wouldn't mind since it came from my contract mon-"
Mance Warner's Mom
"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT WHERE THE MONEY CAME FROM, WHEN IT'S IN MY HOUSE, EVERYTHING'S UNDER MY RULES! NOW GO GET THE CLOROX WIPES AND CLEAN THIS SHIT UP!"
Mance leaps off of the couch.
Mance Warner
"Yes, ma'am."
He picks up his camera and puts it close up to his face.
Mance Warner
"DUBYA L C DUBYA, BABY. OL' MANCER, BABY. MARCH 5TH, SATURDAY NIGHT STORM, EDDIE KINGSTON, LET'S F--KIN' DO THIS THANG! THEY SAY THERE'S 3 THINGS GUARANTEED IN LIFE, BUT IN MANCERS, THERE'S ONLY 2, BABY. LARIATS.."
Mancer pretends like he's lariating the camera.
Mance Warner
"AND LIGHT BEERS!"
He picks up his can of Natty Light to take one last long sip.
Mance Warner
"NOW LET ME HEAD OFF TO CLEAN THIS MESS UP. DUBYA L C DUBYA FANS, I'LL SEE YOU ON THE 5TH, BABY."
Fade to black.
OOC Note: About 1260ish words. Good luck to Eddie Kingston. 
